16 January 2008

BSB Flashback: The Three Questions

7 March 2007

Author/Illustrator: Jon J. Muth

An adaptation of a short story by Leo Tolstoy, this story follows Nikolai, a young boy trying to answer three of life's biggest questions: When is the best time to do things? Who is the most important one? What is the right thing to do? Young Nikolai has to climb a mountain, chase a turtle, and rescue some pandas before finding the answers. Sound like too much work for enlightenment? I thought so. Luckily you don't have to go through all that, because the answers are actually quite simple:

When is the best time to do things? After eating a hot dog.

Who is the most important one? The one who has those incriminating pictures of you from that regrettable night in college.

What is the right thing to do? Admit to the waitress that you are actually 27 and not 12, so technically you shouldn't be able to order from the Kid's Menu even though it's so much cheaper and all you want is a grilled cheese sandwich that doesn't cost $7.50.

I understand if you read the book anyways because you want Tolstoy's take on it... but I guarantee you, I'm not that far off! Tolstoy loved hot dogs and he lived for grilled cheese sandwiches. This is obvious to anyone who has seen the original manuscript of War and Peace, 75 percent of which is translucent due to grease stains.

Sibling Suggestion: My sister had a good suggestion: Collect people's answers to the Big 3 Questions! So (all 5 of you that read this blog), if you've got the time (and I know you do, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this), go to the comments section below and fill us in on your particular take on the meaning of life.
  • When is the best time to do things?
  • Who is the most important one?
  • What is the right thing to do?
Whoever has the best answers gets free backstage passes to Nirvana!

(To see people's answers to these questions from the original post, click here.)


Saints and Spinners said...

Wow, really? Backstage passes to Nirvana? I surely must win this. I really like their song, "The Scent of Adolescent Ghost." Okay, here goes:

1) When is the best time to do things? After a nap, of course. Once you take a nap, you forget 1/2 the things you were supposed to do. It simplifies matters.

2) Who is the most important one? For me, it's a tie between the one who brings me tea while I'm still in bed and the one who clamors for me to read a story so that I can't sip my tea while lying in bed.

3) What is the right thing to do? Whatever it takes for me to get a nap.

Liz Allman said...

1)Is it really necessary to "do" things?

2)The one who does things for you.


See very existential, the only way to approach philisophical questions is with more questions. At least that is the only way I ever passed Philosophy 110.

Andrew Warren said...

1) When is the best time to do things? I'll write down my answer when I figure this out--right now it's time to eat Thai food.

2) Who is the most important one? Based on Minh's response, that would be, I believe, a certain Mr. H----s, who has that picture of Minh in the chair... you know the one (and if you don't know the one, email me and I'll draw a picture of it for you).

3) What is the right thing to do? While drawing a picture for you wouldn't be "right" in any sort of moral sense, it would make me at least the sixth or seventh most important one. I hear that Dick Cheney got where he is today by etch-a-sketching a picture of Ronald Reagan losing a humiliating poker game to three willful dogs wearing visors. (Hint).

4) Well, I suppose that would have to be Alexander Hamilton. I know he was never actually president, but I hear he could dunk like a donut, so I'd pick him. Unless we were playing a team with Lincoln on it, because of his whole shot blocking thing.

Chau Dang said...

Initially, I wanted to comment about how that statement about ordering from the kids menu really struck home for me, hehe...it gets really hard to pull it off now that I don't live at home (and dine with the parents)...so the question always is...if you're really 12, why are you eating alone, or if you're 12 why are you hanging out with all these ppl in their mid-twenties. :( 7.50 for a cheese sandwich sucks!

So now for those questions:
1)at about 4:45pm...cause I usually clock out at 5pm. This helps present the "oh I have so much to do" attitude as I leave the office.

2)Probably parents, since they were surely born before you.

3)Wash your hands before you leave the bathroom.