29 April 2007
Furry Legged Teapot
Author/Illustrator: Tim Myers
This lusciously illustrated re-imagining of a Japanese folktale is about an impatient tanuki (a.k.a. mischievous demon racoon dog). This young rascal tries to perform shape-shifting magic before learning the proper technique... a decision with disasterous results. Ahhh... the impetuouness of youth. The foolish tanuki goes to a local village and, as a prank, turns himself into a teapot. Unfortunately, because he has not properly learned the art of shape-shifting, he gets partially stuck... and ends up as a teapot with raccoon legs that gets chased and caught by superstitious monks.
While it is true that one should be wary of a Furry Legged Teapot, the demon that you should truly be afraid of is the Furry Bellied Rice Cooker. This particular demon preys on the poor souls who are lazy and forget to wash their dishes... usually singling out college students and single men for their moldy torment.
While visiting my sister in college, I was once ambushed by one of those furry demons... damn thing hit me like a Piston Honda jab to the face. To exorcise the vicious demon, I had to use an ancient ritual involving incense, boiling water, and lemon-scented Joy dish soap. Unfortunately, the exorcism was incomplete because (much to my girlfriend's chagrin), the demon continues to haunt me, reappearing every few months. So, if you know what's good for you, keep a close eye on your rice cooker... it cannot be trusted. In fact, it may be plotting against you right now as we speak.
Moral of the story: Do your dishes before your dishes do you.